Friday, March 2, 2018


Whenever we go through an episode it feels crazy. We feel like we have lost ourselves possibly possessed by a demon maybe overtaken by a force greater then ourselves. We tend to lash out act angry cry a lot hurt ourselves etc etc.

This is our storm.

The worst part is those we love end up becoming victims of our behavior and the end result is guilt and shame. We love these people and put them through a horrible situation. Chances are we end up desperate to make it right because we love those so much and will do anything to keep them in our lives.

But the aftermath is pure pain. We must be patient to allow them time to recover from the damage we may have caused. We must understand that even though we did not mean to do what we did even in a time where we can lose all rational thought possibly even dissociate it was still us that hurt them. And after our behavior then we have to deal with this huge piece of sadness.

And then of course more guilt and shame.

I am someone who has no patience. I want to fix things. Never want to have a conflict go on. Want it resolved right away. This is an unreasonable expectation because I am trying to control something I have no control over. My loved ones feelings. I can’t erase it and make it better right away. I have to let time work. And always remember if I break something it may never go back to the way it was. However with glue it can become whole. The issue is I am not glue.

The only glue is time. And when storms hit we can only fix what we can. We cannot do it all overnight.

In the meantime I keep learning these awesome skills and they are helping me to gain wisdom confidence and knowledge about the one person I have been out of touch about for decades me.

We can survive the storms. We can do our best to prevent them but we may not always.

Were human not perfect.


via Tumblr StormsWhenever we go through an episode it feels crazy. We feel like we have lost ourselves possibly...

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